Monday, July 6, 2009

Alperts in the Jungle - 3 day "Hill Tribe" Trek

We last left you waiting out a mini squall in the Chabbad in Chaing Mai (yes, I do know I spelled that differently last time, I'm starting to get used to being able to spell words any damn way I want like they do here.  My favourite is when spaces in between words are completely omitted sometimes.  It can take a couple of minutes of staring at a map before figuring out that Kampaengin and Cam Pai Ngin are the same place).  This post may be a bit long, (or more than just a bit) but I'm trying to make sure I don't forget too many details.  Sorry in advance.
 
Wednesday morning we headed out on our poorly billed "Hill Tribe" trek.  Which was simply awesome.  Though they certainly did not deliver on the authentic hill tribe experience (unless 5 year olds selling junky bracelets is a centuries old tradition that the guide book failed to mention), we had a fantastic time.  It all comes down to the group you're with, and we could not have asked for a better collection of people.
 
Cast of Characters:
 
Dan, our Thai/Burmese guide.  Dan has just started leading trekking tours a couple of months ago after a couple of years driving Israelis around in Jeeps.  He kept surprising us through the trip with random Hebrew phrases, at least he picked up language from the Israelis instead of personality.  He was really great to us, especially about food prep. 
 
Eddy, our second guide who claimed to be 19 but could easily pass as a regular old 12 year old first-in-his-class-to-puberty-doesn't-quite-know-what-to-do-with-the-mini-'stache preteen.  Eddy filled our days with entertainment, as he was particularly fond of jumping off the walls yelling "happy happy happy!!!".  He also spoke words of wisdom beyond his years, including such gems as "Eddy no like beer, but beer like Eddy" and "No joke ... no fun.  No fun ... no baby.  Fun, no baby ... you with ladyboy."  He spent most of the first day munching on a wild mushroom we found in the woods, which made him all the more fun that first night.
 
Ffi and Aneirin, a pair of Welsh friends traveling for a couple of months.  Though we didn't know his name was Aneirin until day three, he had been going by John, a fake name he's been using to avoid people butchering his real name.  Apparently, he came up with John when a Tuk Tuk driver in Bangkok decided to start calling him that.  They were both fascinated to learn about American sports, though repeatedly reminded me how much more exciting rugby is than baseball, and how American football is a stupid name for a game that barely involves your feet. 
 
Flo, a Frenchman who lives in Brighton because, I'm pretty sure, it is the party capital of the world.  He knows more than any one I've ever met about every type of party there is.  In fact, he is currently on his way south to the islands to make it in time for the full moon party in a couple of days.  I think Flo was my favorite trekker, with an easy going attitude, he was totally interested in really learning about other people, and he spoke with a fantastic half French half Irish accent.
 
Tom and Greg, friends traveling around the world for a year and a half.  Tom was the epitome of chill, though his pride in not wearing deodorant may have been misguided on a three day trek.  Greg was also a great guy, though it was a little too evident that he hadn't been around real civilization in a while. 
 
Evan, the only other American.  Who of course went to camp with people from our high school. (Galil) 
 
Bjorn and Torben, German brothers who absolutely love to get high.  Less friendly, though equally nice as every one else in the group, I'm having a hard time remembering any time when something lit was not in their mouths. 
 
Us, the grandparents of the group.  We tried to keep up, though we usually hiked the slowest, were the only ones not to smoke anything, and drank FAR less beer than the rest of the group.  Every one was quite nice to indulge us and still be friends.   
 
Anyway, our trek starts with a ride in the back of a pickup truck to the police station to register for our trip to the national park.  My favorite part of the security and bureaucracy involved was a bit later when our guide simply left the list of trekkers (complete with passport #s) under a rock on an abandoned table in front of an empty building.  Then we headed to market for some essentials, like toilet paper, shades, and of course ice cream.  I thought I had to go to the bathroom, but after taking a quick look I decided I'd be better off with a hole in the jungle.  Our first real destination was elephant riding, which was far more dangerous than it was supposed to be when it turned out our seat was on wrong.  After a quick dangle of the side of an elephant, they fixed it for us and we were ready to go.  Every 40 meters or so they had a little tree house set up to sell you some more bananas to feed to the elephants, but we found one dose of elephant trunk flying in our face sniffing for food to be enough.  We had some very well trained elephants (ours was full grown, its baby was walking along side us) as they clearly knew exactly where each banana stand was and were prepared to stop and grope for food after each one. 
 
After the elephants we drove a short bit more, then started on our trek.  We saw some pretty cool things, including a plant you can use to blow bubbles and the biggest damn caterpillars, spiders, and butterflies we've ever seen.  That first day we walked for a couple of hours, mostly uphill, largely in the rain, and totally in the mud.  It was absolutely gorgeous, albeit a wee bit messy.  We walked through small villages (very underdeveloped - their satelite dishes only receive BBC World, not BBC Sport), thick jungle, and quiet hillside rice paddies.  The rainy season has just started, so the paddies were all freshly planted pools, bordered by VERY slippery mud dividers.  That was fall number one.  By far the muddiest fall.  We rested and swam for a while at a waterfall which would have been refreshing had we not just been rained on for half an hour.  After a bit of scenic fun we finished the last 45 minutes or so of hiking and spent the night at the edge of yet another village.  Only we didn't realize we were at the edge of a village until morning and didn't really get the chance to meet or speak to any local residents.  Oh well.  After resting and dinner (Adina and I got specially prepared veggie curries.  We're told it was a green curry, but there wasn't enough light for me to be sure) they brought out a cooler of beer, and the party started.  We stayed up drinking, playing games, having fun, watching the Eddy show (he likes to yell "ching a ling ling ling!!! before each sip of beer", and generally getting to know every one for a couple of hours.  This is when being with a great group really made a difference.  Even Adina managed to stay up almost as long as everybody else.  Then we went up to our cabin chock full of sleeping pads and mosquito nets (though I shall no longer be calling them mosquitos.  First on a long list of Britishisms I intend to pick up is 'mozzies'.  As in 'those mozzies really had a go up Adina's knickers')  The group was nice enough to let us sleep in the slightly separate room of the cabin, decorated with a hot pink mozzie net and some barbie posters.  
 
After a quick shower (ice cold water dribbling out of a hand held shower head in a roofless wooden shack) we were off for another full day of hiking through the village we stayed in (right past the villages church and school.  As the village children called out from their classroom and waved at us, I began to wish I had learned to say "pay attention to your teacher" in Thai.  Sadly, it was nowhere to be found in Lonely Planet), more jungle, more paddies, more rain, and a lot more mud.  By the time we stopped for lunch our beautiful new Keens were no longer beautiful, new, or anywhere close to their original colors.  After some very good meals on day one, lunch on day two was a bit of a letdown.  We had plain rice noodles in lightly cabbaged ho water prepared specially for us.  Though that is a lot less insulting than every one else's food, which was a large supply of freshly prepared Thai ramen noodle packets.  Though I think they were glad to not be eating Dan's squirrel stew.  Then we slipped back into our blocks of mud and hiked some more until we arrived at our waterfall camp.  I think the hiking on day two was the best.  Adina and I fell back a bit with Aneirin, which was actually really nice because once the group turned a bend in front of us all we had was the peaceful quiet of the jungle.  The greens of the jungle get extra deep after the rain, which totally makes up for the rocky path getting more slippery.  That was fall number two.  Not as muddy, but I did come out of it with a nice gash on my arm.  This time around the waterfall provided a much needed cool down, and a chance to clean up a bit, too.  Though I didn't bring a shampoo bottle to lather up before doing backflips off the rocks like Eddy did, I was going to borrow his soap for a bit.  That is until he stuck it down his pants and 'cleaned' for a while.  I decided I could wait. 
 
The second night was much more subdued than the first, possible because we were tired, more probably because they were all smoking a LOT and kind of lost the ability to move around much.  Than night is when we learned that it only takes a tiny hole in your net before those mozzies really go to town.  Cheeky buggers.
 
Day three we hiked some more, of course,  and once again stopping at a waterfall.  The prospect of again slipping into a wet bathing suit was enough to make us sit this one out, so instead we chatted with Flo for a bit who told me a bit about some more kinds of parties I've never heard of.  He then described the first raves they had in Britain (where they were apparently invented) where you had to know a secret code, get directions from the right guy in the right little town, walk through what seem to be abandoned woods before stumbling upon an abandoned barn with loud music and tons of people.  I was like, "Dude, I know!  I've seen 90210.  That's when Emily Valentine spiked Brandon's drink!"  Though Flo was too young to know what I was talking about.  We then finished up our hike and went bamboo rafting down a lazy little river.  Which was slightly less fun than it sounds. 
 
That pretty  much concludes the story of our trek.  We absolutely recommend it to any one who comes out here, though I'd say find a different company to do it with and hope for as good a group as we had.  We did not learn the deep secrets of the Hmon tribe, nor did we rediscover ourselves in the solitude of the jungle.  We did some beautiful hiking and got to know some fantastic people.  With some beer thrown in for good measure. 
 
Right now we're back in Chang Mai where we'll spend a couple of days touring, relaxing, and learning to cook Thai vegetarian food.  For more on that stay tuned to our next episode. 
 
 
 

1 comment:

  1. Sounds like great fun!

    Adina - how is your hip feeling after all that hiking?!

    ReplyDelete